The Wine Confession


I’m not really a wine guy. I like wine, but I don’t understand all the blends or subtle variances from bottle to bottle. For example, I can’t taste the difference between a Merlot, Shiraz or Pinot Nino.

The Challenge 

Occasionally when out for dinner, my wife and I will decide to buy a bottle of wine and split it. For reasons I don’t understand other then I’m a male, I generally have the burden of selecting the wine we will drink.

As I look though the choices on the wine list, I know I have no clue what I’m doing or what to pick. However, I do know we prefer red wine over white. This knowledge reduces my chance of selecting the wrong wine by 50%.

From this point on my eyes turn to the price tag of all the reds. My price appraisal decision reduces my choices by at least another 50%.

At this point, I’ve usually honed into about 10 wine possibilities. That’s when I start looking at the Merlot, Shiraz and Pinot selections and randomly pick something. I tend to make my final selection based on a region where the wine was produced like California, Italy or Chile. Generally, I buy American.

The Game

When the bottle arrives at our table the Waiter always brings the bottle to me to taste before pouring. Again, I don’t know why this is always my role other than I am male.

The Waiter pours a small portion into my glass and in a circular motion, I swirl the glass around to open up the wine. I then raise the glass to my nose and sniff before a tasting. This is the process I’ve observed others do but I don’t know why I’m doing it.

Once I’ve tasted the wine, I look at the Waiter and nod to communicate that the wine meets my standards. This is always an awkward moment for me because I know I lack any true understanding of the beverage in bottle and I have no wine standards.

The Conclusion

I’d rather order beer than wine when eating out.

#wine #winetasting #confessions #laughalittle

2 thoughts on “The Wine Confession

  1. There is no shame in not being a wine connoisseur. I feel similarly, but other than you, I prefer white over red. And it has to be sweet, something that true wine lovers often frown upon. Who cares? I think you should just order yourself a beer if that is what you are in the mood for. 🍺

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